Chapter 4: Coaching, Counseling and Supportive Communication What did you say?

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Chapter 4: Coaching, Counseling and Supportive Communication What did you say? Slide 2 Copyright 2002, Prentice Hall 2 Objectives Differentiate between coaching and counseling problems Avoid defensiveness and disconfirmation in interpersonal communication Improve ability to apply principles of supportive communication Improve work relationships by using personal management interviews Slide 3 Copyright 2002, Prentice Hall 3 Communication Facts Communication ability determines promotability Communication quality between managers and employees is often low 80 percent of a managers day is spent in verbal communication Slide 4 Copyright 2002, Prentice Hall 4 Effective Communication Accurate, complete shared meaning what sender means is what receiver gets Supportive relationship between sender and receiver is enhanced by communication Timely message arrives when receiver can use information Slide 5 Relationship Between Unskillful Communication and Interpersonal Relationships Abrasive, insensitive, unskillful message delivery Distant, distrustful, uncaring interpersonal relationships Restricted, inaccurate information and defective communication flow Copyright 2002, Prentice Hall 5 Slide 6 6 Managerial Communications Coaching giving advice, direction or information to improve performance I can help you do something better Counseling helping someone understand and resolve a problem him/herself by displaying understanding I can help you recognize that a problem exists Slide 7 Copyright 2002, Prentice Hall 7 Obstacles to Effective Interpersonal Communication DEFENSIVENESS One individual feels threatened or attacked as a result of the communication Self-protection becomes paramount Energy is spent on constructing a defense rather than on listening Aggression, anger, competitiveness, and/or avoidance as a result of the communication Slide 8 Copyright 2002, Prentice Hall 8 Obstacles to Effective Interpersonal Communications DISCONFIRMATION One individual feels incompetent, unworthy, or insignificant as a result of the communication Attempts to reestablish self-worth take precedence Energy is spent trying to portray self- importance rather than on listening Showing off, self-centered behavior, withdrawal, and/or loss of motivation are common reactions Slide 9 Copyright 2002, Prentice Hall 9 Supportive Communication Principles Problem-oriented, not person-oriented How can we solve this problem? NOT Because of you there is a problem. Based on congruence, not incongruence Your behavior really upset me. NOT Do I seem upset? No, everythings fine. Slide 10 Copyright 2002, Prentice Hall 10 Supportive Communication Principles Descriptive, not evaluative Here is what happened; here is my reaction; here is what I suggest that would be more acceptable to me. NOT You are wrong for doing what you did. Slide 11 Copyright 2002, Prentice Hall 11 Supportive Communication Principles Validating, not invalidating I have some ideas, but do you have any suggestions? NOT You wouldnt understand me, so well do it my way. Slide 12 Copyright 2002, Prentice Hall 12 Supportive Communication Principles Specific, not global You interrupted me three times during the meeting. NOT Youre always trying to get attention. Slide 13 Copyright 2002, Prentice Hall 13 Supportive Communication Principles Conjunctive, not disjunctive Relating to what you just said, Id like to discuss this. NOT I want to discuss this (regardless of what you want to discuss). Slide 14 Copyright 2002, Prentice Hall 14 Supportive Communication Principles Owned, not disowned Ive decided to turn down your request because. NOT You have a pretty good idea, but they just wouldnt approve it. Slide 15 Copyright 2002, Prentice Hall 15 Supportive Communication Principles Involves listening, not just talking What do you think are the obstacles standing in the way of improvement? NOT As I said before, you make too many mistakes. Youre just not doing the job. Slide 16 Response Types DIRECTIVE RESPONSE Generally useful when coaching CLOSED RESPONSE Generally useful during later stages of discussion NONDIRECTIVE RESPONSE Generally useful when counseling OPEN RESPONSE Generally useful during early stages of discussion Copyright 2002, Prentice Hall Advising, Deflecting, Probing, Reflecting 16 Slide 17 Copyright 2002, Prentice Hall 17 Personal Management Interview (PMI) Regularly scheduled, one-on-one meeting between manager and subordinate Meeting is designed to assist in continuous improvement Action items are generated and followed up Communication is supportive and two-way Generally takes about an hour Slide 18 Copyright 2002, Prentice Hall 18 Communicating Supportively: Behavioral Guidelines Differentiate between coaching and counseling situations Use problem-oriented statements Be congruent Use descriptive, not evaluative, statements Use validating statements Slide 19 Copyright 2002, Prentice Hall 19 Communicating Supportively: Behavioral Guidelines Use specific, conjunctive statements Own your statements Demonstrate supportive listening Implement a personal management interview program Slide 20 An Analysis of Find Somebody Else STATEMENT 1. Ron 2. Mike 3. Ron 4. Mike 5. Ron 6. Mike Etc.. ANALYSIS OF PRINCIPLES Tends to be evaluative, so will cause defensiveness. Owns rather than disowns feedback. Indicates defensiveness; person oriented; confrontive approach with produce defensiveness. Attempts to be problem oriented, validating, and descriptive. Still person oriented; global, not specific; non-supportive listening. Evaluative; advising rather than asking for alternatives implied accusations; non-specific. Defensive; non-specific; avoids discussing problem definition or problem solutions. Copyright 2002, Prentice Hall 20

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